Good Day Beloved Ones!
The moment we talk of relationships or just two people interacting, we must also talk about conflict. Conflict has become a dirty word and yet it really is a natural phenomena. It is how we usually handle conflict that gives it a bad reputation.
What if we truly learn conflict resolution skills from an early age and had to continues the learning steadily through our educational training. We most likely would have learned to engage the process in a less attack a d defend mode. We could listen more, empathize more, understand more and be understood more.
The author gives some very good tips on engaging in healthy dialogue with whomever you have had a disagreement or conflict; practiced them the next time you are at odds with someone.
The questions for the day are:
. How do you deal with a difficult person in your life?
. How do you get your point across in a difficult relationship?
. Do you avoid conflict or do you end to meet it head on?
I'm sure you have plenty to reflect upon. Make it a peaceful day!
Rev. Sylvia
Good Morning Rev. Thank goodness the holiday's are done for this year and I am back to my routine. I loved this lesson because I think that when you enter into a state of awareness conflict tends to dissipate. I remember when I was going through my divorce many years ago, my former husband and I had a great deal of conflict and difficulty in our relationship especially when it came to our children. He would say mean and hurtful things that just were not true, and I would engage with him wondering why he would say such things to me, then I had an epiphany that just because someone says something does not make it true. The same applies to disagreements Conflict is a duo action, and if I refuse to engage there is and can be no conflict. It doesn't make me right and him wrong or conversely. It does not matter whether you are able to convince someone of your truth or not when Conflict happens the difficult person becomes both people who are as strong in their opinion as the other. So the more you engage the more difficult it becomes and nothing is accomplished. Therefore, I refuse to engage because it doesn't matter at that point. Dealing with difficult people is simple once mastered. WHEN You live your truth, and conflict arises two things will happen with difficult relationships 1. The relationship will change the better or 2. The difficult person/people will leave your life. Either way, both are a blessing Sometimes you don't have to leave people who want to fight usually leave when they can't get one. Thank GOD!
ReplyDeleteDisclaimer: The following comment is not my spiritually-correct response, but my real-life remark.
ReplyDeleteGenerally, I would deal with difficult people with direct statements of how their behavior is affecting me (or the group). Unfortunately, I’ve learned that my tone defies my intention to hide my inner feelings about the situation. So even when I think I chose the least confrontational words, people somehow got my drift. I’ve even had others tell me that my body language and facial expressions reveal what I’m thinking whether I’ve said a word or not. As a result, if someone is ‘listening’ to my words, there’s a chance, they get my point. However, if they get offended, there could be a misunderstanding. So when there was a conflict, I found it most beneficial not to respond with rash behavior, but to think about a win-win solution or a clean I-win solution. When someone attempted to wrong me, there was no better feeling than their failure.
I’m working on this stuff because disrespect is never my intention. These lessons are showing me that the above scenario does not well for me. Having learned about values, and to recognize how people affect each other and that when I criticize others it speaks about me - I am taking in the simple solutions for conflict, provided in today’s lesson. I also know to ask Spirit to resolve any situation.
I am so grateful fot this path of self-discovery because of the ability to look at myself from so many angles. I am diligently working on finding the root of the behavioral pattern I have- to avoid conflict at all costs. I value peace, but at what price? Life continues to bring me situations and people (mostly those closest to me) that offer opportunities to shift this behavior.I realize that I am improving, because lately I have found myself being firm and resilient in speaking up for myself. For me being skilled at compassionate listening often thwarts conflict.
ReplyDelete