Greetings Beloved Ones!
We have been working with the concepts of criticism and I must admit this is a sore spot for me. I don't take criticism very well. Someone just gave me a definition of criticism that rings true for me but one I might what to reevaluate. The thought is , "Criticism is someone's inner judge making a verdict on my life".
The usual response to criticism is the feeling of being judged. How can we change that to something less severe? How can we receive it in a manner that really is helpful? I would think if the person offering the criticism uses "I" statements and really owns their own feelings, that would help. It is when they make "you" statements that one feels the need to defend oneself.
State the behavior, without judgement or using the word "you", own and acknowledge your feelings and then ask for support in what you need or would like to see differently. This is part of a communication process called "Non-Violent Communication". It works if you work it!
. Do you use "I" statements or "you" statements when you are upset?
. How can you tell whether you are offering constructive criticism or judgments?
Well, make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia
Because of my work and observing toxic relationships around me, I've become very cautious about how I come to people with criticism and complaints. I do try to own my feelings but sometimes a "you" will slip out. I will now try to keep them out of the conversation completely and convey that I am coming from a place of Love, Healing and Forgiveness.
ReplyDelete