Stop, In The Name Of Love

Greetings Beloved Ones,
What will you do for love? Or what will you put up with for love? Sometimes love causes us to stop and examine our motivations, expectations, and tolerations! Love is not an excuse for bad behavior!

If love does not result in loving feelings, loving behavior, and loving energy, then it may not be love. Actions should match verbalizations. Stop and ask yourself, "is what I am doing loving?", or if you are on the receiving end, ask, "does this behavior or action feel like love?". If not, address it!

. Has your love ever had a jealous tinge to it?
. Do your actions match your confessions of love?
. What is the most loving thing you ever did for someone?

Well, make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

How to apologize

Greetings Beloved One,
Whoever said "Love is never having to say you're sorry", is quite wrong! Having love for self and others often includes forgiveness and a willingness to apologize!

What an apology says is "I am tuned into your feelings and I want to own my part in whatever hurt my actions, or words may have caused". It must be genuine because it can carry healing energy if shared from a sincere heart.

And, if you are the recipient of an apology, accept it! So often we want an apology and even when we get it, we are reluctant to release the hurt or forgive the other person. It may be true that often time is needed before the apology can be received, but we can at least make every consideration to take it into our heart because it aid the healing process.

. Do you offer apologies easily?
. Who do you need to apologize to?
. How do you receive apologies? Do you accept them and move on? Or do you accept them and still hold on?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Guil

Good Day Beloved,
Guilty!!! That is the pronouncement we usually make when someone does us wrong. Not only are we quick to judge others guilt but we are also quick to hang onto our own guilt.

Guilt is good when it serves to wake us up to our behavior or actions that go against what we say we value. It can be a signal to check our conscience. However, guilt is never a good thing when we use it to repeatedly beat ourselves up. Learn the lesson and move on! To linger and languish in guilt beyond understanding the lesson is not being kind to yourself.

. What do younfeel guilty about?
. What did you learn about your behavior or action?
. Do you ever feel guilty because you feel you "should" do something?
. How do you handle obligations you really would prefer not have to do?
. Do you condemn others?

Well, make it a great day!
Rev. Sylvia

Shame can be healthy

Greetings Beloved One,

Shame, blame, and guilt are certainly uncomfortable feelings. Yet, with regard to shame, it can be a healthy emotion when it signals something you have done wrong. It is a good thing to recognize right from wrong and to be able to accept responsibility for our actions if we have indeed committed a wrong. This denotes a good level of healthy self-respect and love.

It takes a healthy, well balanced and grounded individual to admit their wrongs and to make amends for them. To feel shame helps to keep us on the right path for without it we can slip into acting without regard for anyone.

Let's be clear, we are not talking about taking on the mantle of someone else's shame. If you have been harmed, or abused by someone, there is no shame in that and you must hold the other person accountable.

. Do you make excuses for your mistakes?
. What do you do with shameful feelings when they arise?
. What is the difference between self-pity and shame?

Go deep today!
Rev. Sylvia

The Power of Forgiveness

Greetings Beloved One,
There has been so much written on forgiveness as a quality needed for any kind of growth or healing. Forgiveness is very much tied into your love and respect for yourself.

We know that ultimately it is not really about the other person, but about you and your willingness to heal and move forward. Yet, how often do we hold onto our feelings of hurt thinking and wishing the other person would somehow feel what we are feeling, or understand how they were wrong or hurt you, and suffer a bit to really show they are sorry for what they did to you. Enough already! Take the focus off of them and place it on yourself!

You have the power to heal yourself! Forgvieness is more about you taking back your own power, your own life. Find ways to be more compassionate toward yourself and the act of forgiving others will be easier.

. What needs your forgiveness?
. What are you holding onto that needs to be released?
. Who are you making wrong?
. What have you learned from your mistakes?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia
.

"My Life, Your Fault!"

Greetings Beloved Ones,
We all would agree that "stuff" happens in life, but where we may disagree is who is responsible for what happens. I love the phrase, "My life, your fault" because it points out how willing we are to place blame onto others for what is happening in our lives. Yet, when we do this, we dis-empower ourselves!

Being a victim never bolsters you up! It always gives your life away! It may be hard to look within to see where you have to accept responsibility but that very act places the power of your life in your own hands.

It is not what they are doing to you, but simply what they are doing! Take the focus off of the other and decide what it is you want to do! To blame is lame! Choose, Act, and move forward in the direction of your desires!

. Where are you placing blame for the situations in your life?
. What choice could you make right now that would empower you?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

When others treat you disrespectfully!

Greetings Beloved One,

Ok, we're talking about Self-Respect, Self-Love, Self-Worth, Self-Esteem, just plain feeling good about one's self! But what happens when others do not have all that love or respect for you? Well, if your are strong in all of the above, it won't matter too much. But....if you are not in tune to your own sense of self, you will be easily moved by others opinions and thoughts about you!

Let's be clear, it is never ok to allow others to disrespect you in ways that are harmful to you, physically, or mentally or emotionally! I am not talking about hurting your feelings. I am talking about harming your psyche and soul over time.

Only you can determine when someone is not right for you, but if you do, don't hesitate to distengage quickly. We have a choice as to how we will allow others to treat us. Treat yourself well, and demand others do as well!

. How do you handle disrespect from others?
. Has it ever been difficult to leave a bad relationship? What did that say to you?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Transform Defensiveness

Greetings Beloved One,

What's the difference between your ego and your Self? One needs no defending! When we become identified with our ego sense of self as opposed to our true Self, we succumb to defensiveness. Why? Because the ego's job is to defend the sense of self at all costs! And cost us it does!!!

Instead of trying to defend your "sense" of self, why not spend time trying to uncover and discover your true self, that part of you that is Divine, loving and perfect in God's view. This self exists in love, ease and grace. This self is understanding, compassionate, forgiving, accepting, honoring, and connected to Spirit.

. How is your ego showing up these days?
. What do you do to bring yourself back to your true self?
. Do you love yourself?
. What do you do with your less than stellar aspects of your personality?

Well, make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Speak Respectfully

Greetings Beloved Ones,

What is your self-talk like? Is it kind, loving, respectful? Or do you find yourself speaking negatively or harshly about yourself? Do you put yourself down or belittle your own efforts and achievement? How we speak to and about ourselves is critical to our sense of well being.

Practice affirming yourself and your positive qualities of being! Yes it is healthy to examine areas of needed growth but we must do so in a manner that still honors our being and worth. We can still truthfully and kindly state what is needed.

. Listen to your self-talk today
. Find ten things to affirm about yourself

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Small steps are perfect

Greetings Beloved One,

Ok, how many of you want to be Awakened, God Realized, Self-Actualized, or at the Apex of your Highest Potential right now?! If we are honest, we all want instant perfection. We want to be at our highest and best now. We want to have all that we desire, now. But the truth of the matter is that things and life takes time!

Be patient with your progress! And be patient with your process! Any small overcoming should be acknowledged and celebrated. It is the accumulation of our small steps that actually takes us to our destination. We don't just arrived there alk at once. Life and our growth are a process, so be kind to yourself for every success gained no matter how small, and every lesson learned no matter how challenging.

. What baby steps are you taking right now?
. What successes can you celebrate right now?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

No beating up on yourself

Greetings Beloved Ones!

Wow, today's reading from "Choosing Happiness" was right up my alley. No beating up on yourself!! Why is it that we are do hard on ourselves? Is it because we think if we make a mistake or show up poorly that we will be judged, shunned, ridiculed or simply not accepted? Just the thought of that happening to us is enough for us to be harsh and judgmental with ourselves. But, the truth is, if we don't show love, compassion, forgiveness, gentleness, and understanding toward ourselves the how can we expect others to do so?

One of the hardest lessons is to trulynlearn to love and accept yourself with all of your flaws and personality limitations. We are all here to gore and unfold; to become more of our higher potential and selves. Be patient with the process! That goes for you and for your judgement of others.

Learn and move forward. God only sees the goodness of your heart and soul! So let go and move forward! Shine the Light!,,

. Where are you judging yourself harshly?
. How do you offer forgiveness to yourself?
. Can you embrace your limitations?
. What is the real truth about you? Do you believe it?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Tidying up the people around you

Greetings Beloved One,

Ok, we have all done it, and to no avail! That is, we have tried to change someone and it didn't work. Yet, we try it anyway!

It is so easy to point out other people's flaws and negative personality traits. Why is that? Well because it is harder still to focus on our own flaws and shadow side. Yet, that is what we must do if we are to grow spiritually and psychologically.

It takes a brave heart to truly look into one's own psyche and personality. But do it we must. Let each person tend to their own garden and you be about the business of tending your own weeds!

When you can love, accept and be aware of your hot spots and begin to take positive action to heal them, you will begin to experience wholeness, not to mention peace of being!

. What needs to be healed within you?
. Have you ever been successful at changing someone else? If so, how did you do it?
. What is your greatest fear about facing yourself?
. What is it about others that triggers a reaction in you? Why is that?

Well, there is a lot to examine today so make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Entitled to be yourself

Greetings Beloved,

How many times have friends, family or colleagues felt comfortable enough to tell you what is "Wrong" with you? What is not quite right or perhaps some bad habit you have or annoying trait, or tendenacy? And, you think this is something you want to get rid of.

While it may be helpful to listen to those repeated comments that may ring a familiar bell in you, it is not wise to believe that is all of who you are! You are always more than some habit, tendenacy, or personality quirk. Those are simply "a part" of who you are, NOT all of who you are!

When you can recognize an aspect of yourself it is easier to handle or to make changes than if you believe it to be all of who you are. Stand back and also look at other parts of yourself that you possess that may be just the opposite of your less than favorable traits. This will put things in perspective for you.

. What are your positive traits?
. What are your less than positive traits?
. How do these balance each other or serve you in your growth process?

Well, make it a valuable day!
Rev. Syliva

Give Yourself Good Advice

Greetings Beloved One,

How often do we run here and there looking for someone to give us the right answers to our problems? We believe someone else knows better than we do. But the truth of the matter is that we are wise beyond our knowing.

The answers you seek are truly within you. You just need to begin to trust yourself. What is needed is to find ways to unlock and open up your access to your higher consciousness. Practice writing a letter to yourself from the wise one within you, or journaling the question and answers, or having a conversation with your higher self.

. What do you usually do when you are stuck and need answers or direction?
. Do you trust your own advice?
. What was the best advice you ever gave yourself?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Other people's opinions matter, but less than you think!

Greetings Beloved One,

Why oh why how why do we care so much about what order people think of us? Well, I sups t it is because we may not have learned to care about our selves from a healthy perspective. We may not value our own opinions, self-worth, or we may not trust our own perspectives.

Other people's opinions matter but not as much as you think! When your trust and value yourself you can head the opinions of others without losing who you are. You can hear with a clear hear and an open heart and still remain true to yourself.

Your well-being is not determined by someone else's assessment of you!

. Do you ever find yourself needing other's onions to reassure you?
. How do you handle criticism?
. How do you handle compliments?
. What is your opinion of yourself?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Self-Love and Self-Respect

Greetings Beloved Ones,

Can you tell the difference between self-love and self-absorption? When we are pre-occupied with ourselves we have a tendency to think everything is about us! We think the world revolves around us and we can't tune in to others.

Healthy self-love means that we also respect and love others. The other is sacred and connected to us in meaningful ways.

. How can you tell the difference between self-love and self-absorption?
. How do you support and love others?
. How do you love yourself ?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

"No" is a complete sentence

Greetings Beloved One!

I love the statement, " No is a complete sentence"! Do you ever have a hard time saying no? Or, when you say no, people want to question that no or have you justify it! Well, "No" is a complete sentence!

When you get comfortable with your sense of self, it will be easier to say no and mean it without guilt or doubt. I think the reason we have a challenge saying no is that we fear being rejected, or that we are hurting someone. Well, you do not always have to sacrifice your needs, you can say no if it is right for you.

. Do you have a challenge saying no?
. Do you feel guilty when having to say no?
. Have you ever said no when you wanted to say yes and said no when you wanted to say yes?

Be clear and make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Be a loving to others

Greetings Beloved One,

We all know the Golden Rule, "Do unto to others what you would have them do unto you". Which is a great rule only sometimes we are simply unaware of the impact of our words or behaviors. Our intentions may be pure and full of love but that is no guarantee that it will be received with the same understanding.

What I think is loving, you may think is harsh; what I think is clear, you may think is confusing; what I am offering you, you may not want. Doing into to others can also be about asking what the other needs and how they need it. It can be about open and honest communication about how to love and serve one another according to what will fulfill the other. Ask "how should I do unto you?"

. How do you tune into the needs of others? Your partner? Your friends? Your colleagues? Your children?

Make it a valuable day!
Rev. Sylvia

Situations that harm you

Greetings Beloved Ones!

"Self-respect and self-harm cannot coexist, one saves you from the other". Wow! That is a deep statement! It begs the question of self-love. Do you love yourself enough not to put yourself in dangerous situations, situations that are harmful not just to your physical wellbeing but your emotional and psychological wellbeing?

Why do people stay in toxic relationships? Or accept constant criticism or put downs, or accept disrespect from others? Well, it relates to their level or lack of self-love and sense of worthiness.

. Have you discovered ways in which you may not be loving of yourself?
. Have you discovered ways in which you may feel unworthy?
. How would you handle your boss or friends who are consistently disrecptful or devaluing you?
. Do you criticize, judge or loath your thoughts, feelings and behaviors at times? Do you like who you are or have become?

Look deep and make it a callable day!
Rev. Sylvia